Currently Listening U218 Singles By U2 see related

my hat it has three corners

I'm in thailand again. what a blessing to be back where some of my favorite life memories come from.....

I still have another week, but so far some of the fun has included: poetry night at a German restaurant (always fun with Craig Dahlberg and Pauliver), bartering at the night market, spontaneous group-self-portraits, hugs and tears with long lost friends and teammates, fresh papaya salad, greasy american food, and shopping at the night market.....

I had a layover in Hong Kong. I'd never seen the city so I decided to stop in for a few minutes. Hard to take it all in.... it was beautiful, especially quiet at 6am.

we heart self portraits. and tuk tuks. and breathing in Chiang Mai fumes.

the scariest roller coaster ever (at the German restaurant). my first time eating schnitzel and spatzel by the way. SO yummy!!!

we got orchids in our drinks. hard to make us even prettier than we already are, but girls do love the flowers!!

After dinner at the Dukes. mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Also good to see JC, Derek, Jule, Bobby, Helen....and others. fun reunions!!!!!

Currently Reading The Irresistible Revolution: Living as an Ordinary Radical By Shane Claiborne see related

looks like another year has come and gone. how the heck did that happen?

Last year I wrote about my experience at Passion06 to start my blogging year. I don't really love blogging all that much, but I seem to write in a different frame of mind if I know others may be reading. So I wanted to reflect on my Passion sandwich. :) That being one year with Passion on both ends. (Passion being the worship conferences put on for college students every year.) Forgive me for the random thoughts-- it's almost 1am and there's a lot of processing i still have to do. This is kind of verbal diarrhea.

Being the stubborn person that I am I for some reason had it in my mind that I wasn't going to let Passion affect me this year. It was going to be all work... I had Urbana and Passion back to back, and I knew I'd be exhausted. I was looking forward to both conferences BUT for doggone sure wasn't going to let them be an emotional spiritual high. But God chose to work in my heart despite my stubborn attitude (maybe because I asked him to speak to me in a new and fresh way). I'm realizing (but tend to forget more frequently) I'm the type of person that is really extrinsically motivated, so it's good for me to have seasons of being fired up. People like Matt Redman and Louie Giglio and John Piper fire me up. I need people like them in my life. People who live authentically and bring the Word powerfully. I got to hear Francis Chan for the first time in my life and loved him. He actually gave a wonderful analogy about the Word and Pez dispensers, but I won't even try to go there. I laughed hard.

I must quickly mention what a blessing Urbana was for me in my job. I got excited about what I was doing again which I knew could only come from the Lord. I got to share the joys of living in China and hear stories from people from all over the world about how God was calling them to ministry. It was a blessing to be in that position. I prayed with countless people and was distinctly aware of the Spirit's presence and guidance. I still know I'm not meant to be a recruiter forever, but I was blessed through my job in that short time.   (side note, i ate at cracker barrel for the first time ever.... can't say it was so memorable, i fell flat on my face while getting out of the hot tub in my hotel and severely bruised and strained many parts of my body--which, while painful, was freaking hilarious, and I missed Bono's speech. DANG).

Oh, and I guess it was Urbana that I began thinking about what I was really challenged with at Passion. I went and listened to Shane Claiborne talk about his community and challenge students to radically change their lifestyle to live simply and truly love the poor. I'd been wanting to read his book for awhile, so it was cool to hear him in person and I picked his book up on the last day and decided to read it right away instead of Traveling Mercies like I had planned. Turns out reading this book has been the best and worst decision of my entire life, because I'm pretty sure things are going to change for me from here on out. Or at least they'd better. This entry is already entirely too long already and I haven't even come close to summarizing all of my thoughts, so I won't try too much harder. Let's just say that the American Dream makes me want to puke more than it ever has before. And in the same breath as that, I can say that I've become to cynical and critical of how others live their lives--before I can say anything more I need to stop and change my own life. I'm not exactly sure what that's going to look like for me but I'm praying fervently about this...

So while reading Irresistible Revolution I'm worshipping with 22,000 college students and being challenged to not waste our lives with guilt, but to fall more deeply in love with Jesus. And to live a life of worship by caring for our neighbors here and across the globe. I'm deeply convicted of a number of things (that I think I've always known but are now becoming just a bit clearer): That I've been given a life of privilege and that I've been wasting much. That God has given me a love for people and adventure and diversity and wants to use me in a cross-cultural context for much of my life. And that I don't need what tomorrow holds but that I can truly trust in God's sovereign grace.

So I have a few things to process. I like sleeping though, so i think I'll do that now.

Currently Listening Messiah (George Frederick Handel) London Philharmonic Orchestra By Handel, London Philharmonic Choir and Orchestra, Alldis see related

now THIS is rock 'n' roll

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Currently Reading Bono: In Conversation with Michka Assayas By Michka Assayas see related

A lot of times I plan out what I'm going to say to Bono when I meet him someday. As I read this book, I'm struck by how the Lord uses some people. Bono has to be one of the most influential gifted leaders ever to walk on this planet. I'm inspired. To do what, I'm not sure. But I'm inspired.

Green Lake is a great place to run, even in the winter. I guess it's not the winter, but close enough for me. I might get seasonal affective disorder from the 8 days I'm in Grand Rapids. The sun came out for a few minutes this morning. whoa. I had a bad run this morning, though. I couldn't keep a good pace. I'm feeling pretty confident these days, though. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing a marathon sometime in the next year. Yikes, now that that's written down, does that mean I'm locked in?

I've been feeling so emotionally nostalgic about old friends lately. I've run into countless old friends in the past week and made appointments to see more in the upcoming week.... brad, kovonne, cara, dave...more.... What a blessing to have so many people in my past that have had both big and small roles in helping me become who I am today. I'm so happy, but at the same time, there's this feeling of sadness that kind of shadows my heart because most of these people aren't in my life regularly any more. Can everyone move to Pasadena?

I had a Halloween party. We had fun. That's me in the big hair.

A bigger blessing on October 31 is that Trey Andrew Van Groningen was born. He's cute. And healthy. I think Caden is still getting used to having a brother. I can't wait to meet Trey in a few weeks at Thanksgiving!!

 so many new things since i've last written. i feel like my xanga is like my diary in j-high. sometimes, when i felt like life was exciting, i wrote in it every day-- sometimes twice a day. now, things aren't so exciting, or at least they seem a little samey....

so here's the news that brings me back to my diary: I'm going to Thailand in January. I'm SO incredibly excited about the opportunity. It'll have been almost 2 years back in the US by that time, so i can't even wait for the opportunity to get out of the country again. is it possible these borders make me feel claustrophobic? I thought i'd get to go to Africa next or maybe Europe... BUT i'm not even close to complaining about going to Thailand. I'll be representing my department at our Annual Thailand Conference, so I'll be working, but YAY and WOO HOO!

i moved to Pasadena. that brought a little excitement to the samey-ness of life. my neighborhood rocks my socks off. it's the first time i've lived downtown in an American city. not too shabby. my new roommate Suzanne is nice. She goes to Fuller. I miss my old roommates Liz and Shannon (and AMY!) but I feel really blessed to have found this place. It seems pretty providential. I hope my social life will pick up. Though I was just trying to find a Friday evening to enjoy Disneyland with my friend Amy Cooper and I realized I'm busy for the next 6 Fridays. Then it's Thanksgiving. Then it's December. Then I go to Urbana and Passion. Then I go to Thailand. time flies. I'm almost 27! and i feel so old, meaning no offense to those that are older than me. Suzanne told me (she's a doctoral student of psychology) that more people freak out about aging and dying in their 20s and 30s than at any other age, believe it or not. I believe it! I've felt indestructable most of my life and all of a sudden I'm nearing 30 before I can even blink and I'm thinking about wrinkles and how much i want to do before I die..........

two weekends ago, i went home for a wedding and my nephew's birthday: